Probably To Soon To Mention This
*** continued from previous post ***
To most people this would seem like an innocuous statement. A simple deceleration of an appallingly innocent action to be taken at a later date, and one, depending on the person, that may or may not happen. With your mom there was no doubt. Within three days of returning home your mother would have the Amazon truck backing up to the door, unloading every book pertaining to moose that had ever been written. She would devour these books within a few short weeks.
Most people would be spewing information like a lawn sprinkler whilst they read on the subject - but not your mother. She would never, ever mention the topic while she was reading, or thereafter. That's just creepy. However, her arcane and detailed knowledge of the moose, if the past was any indicator, would pop up from time to time taking me completely by surprise.
She did the same thing with women's gymnastics, NASCAR, mountain climbing, a small South American tribe that the name escapes me, and men's ice skating.
I don't think skating was so much an issue of studying the subject as I believe it to be a kind of 'channeling'. For example, when the topic of Olympic skating would worm its way into our conversation, oddly enough every four years, your mom's eyes would glaze over and she would stare into the distance as she repeated each contestants given and 'Christian' names, their skating history, their home life, religion, social practices, pet's names, favorite foods, childhood friends, lineage, and blood type.
I TOLD you it was creepy!
As you can see, the handwriting was on the wall. Your mom was well down the path to that darkest corner of the natural sciences - Moose-a-thology. Tragic, I know. There was naught to do but stay out of her way until the fever ran its course in ten years or so.
How many moose are we talking about frolicking below? As the day wore on even your mom got bored watching them. Let's just say there were a lot. Then add four to that total. All I could think was 'Damn. That's going to be a lot of shaggy beasties to dodge when we ride back to civilization'.
Which triggered another thought that had been playing on the periphery of my mind, but one I thought it too soon to mention it to your mother. Don’t think bad of me for what I’m about to tell you. The thought was this: 'I wouldn't mind seeing another bear'.
Yeah, probably way too soon to bring that up to your mom.
No, definitely too soon.
*** the journey continues ***
To most people this would seem like an innocuous statement. A simple deceleration of an appallingly innocent action to be taken at a later date, and one, depending on the person, that may or may not happen. With your mom there was no doubt. Within three days of returning home your mother would have the Amazon truck backing up to the door, unloading every book pertaining to moose that had ever been written. She would devour these books within a few short weeks.
Most people would be spewing information like a lawn sprinkler whilst they read on the subject - but not your mother. She would never, ever mention the topic while she was reading, or thereafter. That's just creepy. However, her arcane and detailed knowledge of the moose, if the past was any indicator, would pop up from time to time taking me completely by surprise.
She did the same thing with women's gymnastics, NASCAR, mountain climbing, a small South American tribe that the name escapes me, and men's ice skating.
I don't think skating was so much an issue of studying the subject as I believe it to be a kind of 'channeling'. For example, when the topic of Olympic skating would worm its way into our conversation, oddly enough every four years, your mom's eyes would glaze over and she would stare into the distance as she repeated each contestants given and 'Christian' names, their skating history, their home life, religion, social practices, pet's names, favorite foods, childhood friends, lineage, and blood type.
I TOLD you it was creepy!
As you can see, the handwriting was on the wall. Your mom was well down the path to that darkest corner of the natural sciences - Moose-a-thology. Tragic, I know. There was naught to do but stay out of her way until the fever ran its course in ten years or so.
How many moose are we talking about frolicking below? As the day wore on even your mom got bored watching them. Let's just say there were a lot. Then add four to that total. All I could think was 'Damn. That's going to be a lot of shaggy beasties to dodge when we ride back to civilization'.
Which triggered another thought that had been playing on the periphery of my mind, but one I thought it too soon to mention it to your mother. Don’t think bad of me for what I’m about to tell you. The thought was this: 'I wouldn't mind seeing another bear'.
Yeah, probably way too soon to bring that up to your mom.
No, definitely too soon.
*** the journey continues ***
Labels: bear, men's figure skating, moose, NASCAR
posted by David M at
10:00 AM
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Keep it nice or I release the Zombies.
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